by m_ficus

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dark times, wild jams


released August 3, 2015



all rights reserved



music for your nerves

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Track Name: Afternoon Morning
its another sort of
afternoon morning
one where i wake up really late
and feel like i just expended twenty lives and galaxies in only 5 hours
maybe less
i dont keep track much
i dont keep much of nothing but nothing
wrapped up in it
cause i dont sleep when im supposed to
i could
but i dont

i dont even have enough motivation for that i just sit and exist and cease to desist in being the something amiss that destroys and makes ugly of pretty things and makes such lust of deathly things in such lust that caresses me like no other but with a guilt in her eyes unequal of mine

it is less
Track Name: No Progress
who ever said i got better
can go stick their head in the shitter
where things might make more sense
there is no progress
there is regress
i digress

it is ignorant and rightfully blissfully so as an old adage would go off of a bridge in burning glory without me in the car that i lost keys too perhaps deathly things took them and loaned them to death himself but why would death want my car its a piece a shit a piece in any currency from this world or the next oh death and his ly things are cheats and whores but they know how to do their jobs
Track Name: breath
i need to breathe slower
i need to become a buddhist
and not a middle aged american man one
i mean the real
i mean like really sit and breathe really slow
fuck fuck fuck
panic youre too old
seriously youre gross now
i dont want you anymore
please stop touching me
im not into you
Track Name: Yes Tamara, I See The Lights
yes i see the lights
theyre hospital ones
theyre emily’s lights
i was on kitchen floor minutes ago
and if death didnt look pretty then
she sure do now
shes a million colors
manifest inside city issued light bulbs
is this the end
this end is the
or simply another
its me
isnt it
isnt it
Track Name: The Catharsis
it rained today
and im so happy that it did
you have no idea how happy i was
how happy i used to be
only minutes ago
im not trying to be an edgelord
i just hate the sky sometimes
when its blue and its grinning
it kinda makes me wish i wasnt alive sometimes
maybe not dead, but def not living
deaf dumb blind and devoid of feeling
cause im really scared the sky will one day fall
and no james bond superhero could save us all
or even a few, because the world before my green eyes is the only world i view
we are all relative
our friends and relatives
the relic relatives relegating my ass to socially defunkt
my fam isnt fam
thats why i made some instead
homies couldnt take me out of my alcatraz head
i dont know if my girlfriend loves me
sometimes i wonder if im already dead
i think im focused
i think im too focused
or maybe not enough
im hearing those locusts
buzz like lonely man on friday night
not enough charisma to do friday night right
no love, no hope
guilt, fear, and shame
Track Name: The Ending
you just sat through eleven tracks of melodrama
how does it feel?
well i hope you feel something
cause i know i havent felt nothin but
bad and sad and hate and death
so i mean if you dont feel nothin
then this was for nothin
you feel me?
thats all i ever wanted to know